The Significance Of Kuching

When I was busy trying to make an unworkable marriage work and cleaning baby shit, my peers were flying business class to important conferences on the other side of the globe, partying in Shanghai and the rooftop bars of Bangkok, comparing the latest Ws and voting in best airline polls.

Travelling is one of the greatest sacrifices of young motherhood. From being able to take off at any whim and fancy (budget allowing) pre-motherhood, to making endless packing checklists (motherhood), my holiday destinations dwindled from luxury party destinations and exotic locales to family-friendly resorts (with mini club please).

I had once prided myself in being a travel junkie, but when my marriage broke up and I was forced to reevaluate my dreams, I realised that in the last few years, I had been nowhere new and it was one of the causes why I felt so isolated and removed from this world. I am embarrassed to admit that just like I'd defined myself by whom I was dating, I'd also defined myself by where I had been. I have stood at the Parthenon, therefore I am kind of thing. Sad but true (notice all of this is in the past tense).

The thing about motherhood is that even when you do get time to go off by yourself, you are never free of the guilt that you left someone behind. And you allow it to eat at you, until you realise that instead of working on that black on the ski slope, you're on the phone, counting 8 hours ahead.

Holidays with young children are holidays for them, for a parent, it's work as usual. But as ZW grows and becomes more independant, so my heartstrings stretch and relax. I have learned that he can live for a few days without me, and vice versa. I know that he not only lives, but actually has a blast! No Mummy means no vegetables, no bedtime, no nagging. I also realise as he gets older that hey, he can come with me! He can walk, listen and most importantly, understand! No, this does not mean he's ready for the Everest Base Camp just yet, but we are slowly getting there.

This weekend, at the behest of Slapper, I shall be travelling to Kuching for the Rainforest Music Festival and ZW is coming with me. Travelling to Kuching may not sound especially exciting to some, but for me, it's the first stop in my quest to visit at least one new place every year. It is the first step in a long time, a first step for things to come. It's a place I always said I would go but shelved for another time, whenever that was supposed to be. It will be first tick in my freshly drawn up checklist of Places To See Before I Die.

In that respect, it symbolises my first step in the right direction.

I am really looking forward to it, to travelling with ZW, Chum and Chunk, and spending time with Slapper and her friends.