The Fear Factor

I know I've mentioned The Idea a few times but never elaborated.

Reasons:
1. Too risky - someone might steal it
2. Too embarrassing cos can be rather ambitious
3. Too forthright in case it never happens, so I become like all talk and no action.

But the truth of the matter is that if I don't let it out someday, the following applies:
1. Stealing ideas is one thing, making it happen is another
2. Ambition is good and everyone has dreams. Better to aim for the sky and touch the treetops rather than to not have left the ground at all.
3. I have a blog for goodness sake, I am all talk anyway!

So here are my ideas (hands off and yes, there are more than one):
1. Open a jamu bar and promote healthy Indonesian tonics in a trendy way.
2. Sell baby clothes. (This idea is wearing out - mind the pun - cos you can actually get quite cute ones at reasonable prices here).
3. Design and sell maternity wear (a big possibility)
4. Publish a new magazine/bring in a new title (sigh)
5. Manufacture home soft furnishings (once I improve my sewing skills)
6. Buy cheap clothes and shoes and auction them on Ebay.
7. The dream of all dreams - to open sandwich cafe/deli.

Sigh, so many ideas, so little money. But I guess, they say where there is a will there is a way. And trust me, the will is there. Did I mention as of this Friday, I begin life as a part timer at work?

Yes, the accountants are not as backward as I made them out to be.

But this also means cash is running high and dry!

I have always wanted to do my own thing and in my younger days. I was alot braver and would have jumped at the opportunity. Failure did not even feature. My Mum said that at the age of one I started walking and was ready to conquer the world.

Now, I am a different person. Now, it's a lot harder.

Where did the gungho-ness go? Has burning ambition cooled to latent ash? If I was so ambitious, why didn't I take the plunge all those years ago? Rationality has a point but others speak of following the heart. Do I have any ambition left? What if I fail?

Huzir Sulaiman was once quoted in an interview as saying, "At thirty, you can't rely on youthful promise anymore. You have to deliver".

And that is what scares me most.